Antonia Bernardin

I did the whole travelling there a few years ago and while it was an incredible privilege full of once in a lifetime experiences, there some things that I never hear being talked about online.

This isn’t necessarily, like, pros and cons, more like, little realities you might face.

1. Nobody cares

I know that sounds harsh but it’s true, especially if you travel solo, you will never be able to tell your stories or show your photo’s. Beyond the initial excitement that you are back, no one wants to hear it. Whether it gets repetitive, or if its an experience they may never be able to share in because of how expensive it is and therefore, it’s not fun to hear about.

Whatever the reason, they do not five a fuck. You will get eye rolls, you will get jokes about ‘you’ve been travelling, it’s never been mentioned before’. And while you’ll be coming at this from the perspective of that you’ve had this incredible experience you want to share, the truth is, it is obnoxious after a while. Think of how Colin Brigerton sounds in the Brigerton series. There is no way to tell these stories without sounding like a dickhead. It will hurt your feelings, it will create a kind of loneliness around this experience that lives in isolation in your mind but that is something you will have to accept.

Nobody wants to hear it. Nobody cares.

2. Travelling involves travelling…

Sounds obvious but I feel like I need to emphasise the fact that in-between these gorgeous photo’s and amazing cities etc is HOURS UPON HOURS sat on some kind of fucking transport. I once spent AN ENTIRE DAY on a boat and we still didn’t get to our end destination.

DAYS will be spent on coaches, on airplanes and so on. It’s both boring and stressful. I mean, as a reader I at least had an internet free way to entertain myself, but that is another thing to bear in mind, you might not have signal.

If you are doing the kind of hop on and off with a tour group style travelling like I did, this will definitely become a repetitive blur.

3. It is not glamorous

Those jokes about grimy backpackers? Not unfounded. It will be difficult to wash your clothes at times. There will be gross toilets. There will be 12 person dorms. There will be questionable bedding. There will be rubbish, ice cold showers, with doors that don’t lock properly.

It is obviously possible to avoid these things, but with cheap travel comes the price you must pay.

Don’t get me wrong, there are some hostels I stayed in that were nicer than some hotels. But there was also a hostel that was a glorified tin hut, which flooded in an ELECTRICAL STORM… I mean, it was right on the beach though, near some big clubs, so…

When I was younger and more extroverted, I could deal with these things but it is my literal idea of hell now, which leads on to my next point.

4. Travelling is geared towards extroverts

Whether you do solo backpacking, or a group tour thing, or if you take a friend. There will be near constant human interaction and you will be going to a lot of crowded places. I wasn’t alone once, except to pee, for 3 months. It is the norm to go to these places, make friends, then travel with those new friends for a bit, or sight see, or change you plans to meet up with them.

Yay, new humans to figure out, constantly.

I come across as fairly extroverted but it was through these trips I discovered that I am an introvert wearing an extrovert trench coat. As a result, I’m not sure people I met got the best side of me, I’m not sure I always behaved as nice as I could have. I was strugglinggg and incredibly anxious but didn’t really know then what I know about myself now.

5. A lot of people who go traveling are wealthy

Nothing wrong with the fact they are wealthy, but, if you don’t come from money and have saved up to go on your trip, you will be in the minority because it is very very expensive to go travelling. This disparity, in both disposable income and lived experiences, was actually more difficult than I expected it to be. I’ve never been so thoroughly confronted with the class structure in the UK. Not to mention, missing out on excursions because of budget restrictions, eating different food for the same reason (or not eating at all…).

6. It will be both the best and the worst time of your life

Though this blog might make it seem otherwise, I don’t regret the time I spent traveling and I still love seeing beautiful places, as shorter, slightly pricier holidays and I still travel to them solo.

But the thing about travelling-travelling, the kind aesthetically portrayed on social media, is that nobody talks about the duality of the experience. It was both the loneliest I have ever been and yet I had never been more surrounded by people. I was learning about myself at the same time as realising my utter insignificance in this world. I came to learn about and see new cultures but I was unprepared for what cultural differences would feel like as a guest in their countries and away from everything familiar.

I loved the things I got to experience and see but the crushing weight of it being ‘once in a lifetime’ and so expensive and such a privilege, put a lot of pressure on me to never take a second to rest, for fear I would ‘miss out’.

There you go, I had no plan when I sat down to write this one, so I just blurted out as many points as came to the top of my head.

People will often call you ‘brave’ for travelling and I understand why because you have to love it, it has to be a passion because it isn’t always easy. I know some people might be rolling their eyes at this, because, I got do these wonderful, amazing things, what right do I have to complain? And I’m not, this are just some behind-the-scenes things I wish I had been aware of.